Justice and civic duty

I went to that hive of scum and villainy called INA market in Delhi. I suppose it's unfair to call it villainous but, yes its pretty filthy and stinky.

I saw a small child sneak a furtive look at the owner of the vegetable stall/store i was in and hastily rip off some vegetative matter, stuff it in his mouth and walk away nonchalantly.

In an indignant rage, I raised an alert and after a short yet surprisingly eventful chase the minute vagabond was accosted, apprehended and delivered a sound and thorough beating. I lead that chase myself and handed the urchin over to the lynch mob that had gathered.

As I saw many outraged people beat up that little thief, I felt a deep sense of pride in having done the right thing. I was a good outstanding citizen..

hhhahah hell no, that's not what happened at all. Yes the kid did steal some random vegetables and eat them but he just walked away scot free to rob another day.

Do you think I would yell and scream and run after a hungry poor child just to get him beaten up? If that's what you think, you are wrong. In reality, it would have been too much too much work for me. An important person like me has better things to do. I simply continued to lounge near the aubergines and let the crime go unnoticed and unpunished. In that sense, I am God. And you, kogi kashewnut, are a turd..

 

musing.

another one of those days when everyone smells like chlorine

State and Church and Bank

I called CitiBank today and the customer service person ended the call with

Thank you for calling CitiBank, God Bless you.

odd.

overachievering animals

today, on the way to work I was overtaken by a three legged dog.

Even more notes from delhi wilderness

i saw a feral she-swine. She was voluptuous and juicy. She was accompanied by a fine looking baby-back-rib delivery mechanism aka piglet. Its a shame that they eat garbage and parasites. Else one could feast on them impromptu.

I saw a cow shitting. Tail raised, poo coming out. Traffic intersection

Still no sign of monkeys. Perhaps there is no god

The car industry here denies the Indian driver a common and critical vehicle feature. The sun roof. Surely we need it for when (all these conditions must apply simultaneously):
1. The weather is nice
2. There is no pollution
3. There is no danger of birds shitting on you
4. There is no danger of monkeys climbing in
5. There is no danger of beggars climbing in
6. The sun isnt going to kill you
Why should westerners have sun roofs and we dont? Its racist, thats what.

I tried comparing raw kajus to a fully fledged kaju barfi with silver foil. There is no competition. The Kaju Barfi is far far superior. Clearly man-made is better than nature made. Also they are fat and calorie free. Its healthy as hell

At the Delhi Golf Club lawn, one of my chair legs sunk deep into a soft spot in the mud. After extricating the chair, I planted an ice cube in the soft sand. In maybe 100,000 years or so, I expect it to mature into a glacier.

On tv I saw hippos eating a dead zebra. no kidding

When you have the shits on an aircraft (like maybe 10 times) try and poop at different toilets so as to maintain the weight balance of the plane.  Also it will deter passengers from knowing you have the shits. Personally i attribute the stomach crisis to kaju barfi deprivation. death approaches