Automated Vending Machines
For thousands of years of Indian civilization, decent and law abiding delhites would withdraw money via one of three ways:
1.Send a peon to the state or national bank: This one is for working adults
2.Take it from the back of your parents' Godrej cupboard. Damn that thing makes noise! You know what age you are you pilfering bastards*
3.Beat it out of smaller, weaker children. Ah junior school. good days.*
Then came the global revolution and decent folk rubbed shoulders with dhik-chik puppis at fancy-ass ATMs.
What people may not remember is that there was an automated vending machine up and running well before ATMs took off.
When me and my homeys heard of the first coke machine in the country we had to check it out.1998 was it? This miracle of modern science aptly resided in Ansal's Plaza, the first mall in Delhi.
Anyway we whip out cash ready to feed it to the machine and be rewarded with sweet, sweet coke, but no! We are thwarted by some lame ass peon equivalent with a bandoleer of 5 rupee coin cartridges. He takes our money, removes shiny coins from his belt, puts it in the machine and hands us our coke cans. Damn you vending machine troll!
Never forget that whatever technology achieves, in India human beings will always be cheaper. Take that you dignity of labour bastards!
* I'll have you know I never pilfered money and sadly I was one of the smaller kids. you turds.
1.Send a peon to the state or national bank: This one is for working adults
2.Take it from the back of your parents' Godrej cupboard. Damn that thing makes noise! You know what age you are you pilfering bastards*
3.Beat it out of smaller, weaker children. Ah junior school. good days.*
Then came the global revolution and decent folk rubbed shoulders with dhik-chik puppis at fancy-ass ATMs.
What people may not remember is that there was an automated vending machine up and running well before ATMs took off.
When me and my homeys heard of the first coke machine in the country we had to check it out.1998 was it? This miracle of modern science aptly resided in Ansal's Plaza, the first mall in Delhi.
Anyway we whip out cash ready to feed it to the machine and be rewarded with sweet, sweet coke, but no! We are thwarted by some lame ass peon equivalent with a bandoleer of 5 rupee coin cartridges. He takes our money, removes shiny coins from his belt, puts it in the machine and hands us our coke cans. Damn you vending machine troll!
Never forget that whatever technology achieves, in India human beings will always be cheaper. Take that you dignity of labour bastards!
* I'll have you know I never pilfered money and sadly I was one of the smaller kids. you turds.
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posted by zeminky @ 11:16 AM
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