Vegetarianism

Being born on Mahavir Jayanti it is perhaps unremarkable that my mystical empathy towards other living things manifested as voluntary vegeterianism at a young age. Now when I am older and wiser I bond with animals in another way. By eating them. And so I did at the massive ninth avenue food festival. Millions of people went there to only to realise that there were just a few stalls cloned hundreds of times. I had lemonade, roast pig sandwich, corn on the cob, smoked turkey leg (yes, the big-ass hunk of turkey meat that makes you feel like a caveman), meat pie, baklava, crabcakes, spare ribs, pulled pork with beans and rice, funnel cake, fried oreos, key lime pie and frog legs. Yes, frog legs too and yes, they do taste exactly like chicken. I would have eaten the alligator sausage too but they were sold out, the bastards.