Why Nepal should NOT be secular.

This is a serious blog and not for your amusement. I have been reading about issues in Nepal for a while and today's bbc.co.uk article (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/5015456.stm) on secularism in Nepal is something all of us should feel strongly about.We must take a stand against secularism in Nepal. It should remain a Hindu theocracy.

For the last forty years, Nepal has officialy been a Hindu kingdom. Around 80% of the populations is Hindu. The remaining 20% is mainly Buddhist with a small Christian minority. Of late, change has been sweeping the tiny mountain kingdom. Notably, monarchy has made way for a multi-party system. Maoist rebels are in peace talks with the government. These transitions have not been smooth. But then there was a parlimentary decision to declare Nepal a secular state. In most countries this is a preferable practice but I feel this should not be so in Nepal. The reason for this can be found in another BBC article (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/5019288.stm). Why no one else has spotted the disturbing connection, I do not know. The headline for the article was :

'Dead' Everest climber 'is alive'

Thats right, the dead are coming back to life to eat us all. I.e. the himalayas are spawning zombies. Do buddhists burn their dead? No. Do christians? No. They just bury them or leave them lying around. Only hindus burn their dead and scatter the ashes. This is critically important in preventing reanimated corpses from coming back to life, taking our jobs and hitting on our women. Hence Nepal should not become secular. Speak up and let your voice be heard. Say no to the undead.

Vegetarianism

Being born on Mahavir Jayanti it is perhaps unremarkable that my mystical empathy towards other living things manifested as voluntary vegeterianism at a young age. Now when I am older and wiser I bond with animals in another way. By eating them. And so I did at the massive ninth avenue food festival. Millions of people went there to only to realise that there were just a few stalls cloned hundreds of times. I had lemonade, roast pig sandwich, corn on the cob, smoked turkey leg (yes, the big-ass hunk of turkey meat that makes you feel like a caveman), meat pie, baklava, crabcakes, spare ribs, pulled pork with beans and rice, funnel cake, fried oreos, key lime pie and frog legs. Yes, frog legs too and yes, they do taste exactly like chicken. I would have eaten the alligator sausage too but they were sold out, the bastards.

Atlas really wants to scratch his back

Mighty Atlas bears the earth on his broad shoulders and so I too must bear the burden of leadership. As Deputy Fire Warden of the 22nd floor I am now required to log in every morning at the front desk. What more do they want from me? Protecting the people is a thankless life but with great power come great responsibility and I must do whats right.

Therefore I did not log in today.