They have come to save us all

After five years, superman has come back to save us all. But in the excitement of superman's return and the workout he got lifting that new continent and all, some events have gone unnoticed. Mainly that superman is not the only one to have returned after many years. Thats right, other heroes have made their way back here, no doubt to save us all.

Three of the five heroes were in hanes ads. There was an ad with Michael Jordan and Kevin Bacon neither of whom had been seen in years. The ad suggested that the two of them live together in a big house playing games with each other. The home-erotic tensions between them makes me want to buy hanes right now.

In another hanes ad I saw Mr. T. For the younger amongst you, Mr T. is a super strong hero, possible second only to the Hulk in strength. I believe he would pity the fool that doesn't wear hanes.

Then I saw McGyver doing the Mastercard ad. Priceless.

Lastly, I saw Godzilla doing a doritos ad. I'm glad to see the big guy back on his feet and working again. He was going through a tough time earlier what with the getting tangled in a bridge and being shot full of missiles. Police brutality hadn't been so bad since the two kings, Rodney and Kong.

So do the right thing, go out and use your mastercard to buy doritos and hanes. And remember to be like supey and wear your burgundy briefs outside your pants. Or be like the Hulk and wear purple shorts. Maybe he should be plugging Hanes too.