The politest girl

She walked into the doctor's office stumbled over a rug and fortuitously fell onto a chair. The doctor looked up briefly and returned to the crossword he'd been working on all morning.

"Hello dactar shahib." She purred.

"Ah, Ms. Burningyellowcandles. I presume you are here to talk about your recent operation? I'm looking at your case report right now. Have you been drinking?" He stared at the clue for 5-Across.

"Of courshe not I'm completely shuber and pleashe dactar, call me Khemcho. Do you mind if I have a digarette?"

"Er... yes Khemcho go ahead. So about the job we did on your noggin. After we opened the skull, we were surprised by the development of certain parts of your brain."

"Am I espeshially shmart?!" Khemcho slurred, leaning forward in anticipation.

"Um, no. In fact, most of the cognitive functions were below the level of a toddler or perhaps equal to that of a retarded dog. What was fascinating was the malinguadinga lobe."

"The whaaaa?" Khemcho drooled with the effort to comprehend the big word.

The doctor glared at her.

"In layman's terms, its the part of the brain that controls foul language. Your lobe comprised over 95% of your brain. To be frank, you have a potty mouth. In fact..."

He paused to smile kindly "In fact dear, we took the liberty of putting in a little microchip. It might, er, alter your potty mouth tendencies. "

"Thish is bogush dactar. I won't believe any of this microship nonshenshe." Khemcho stood up indignantly. She stormed out of the office, banged into the doorway and turned around. Her eyes narrowed in anger.

"YOU KNOW WHAT? THANK YOU!"

From that day forth, Khemcho was know as the politest girl in Booty College. It was noted that she was always thanking people no matter what they said to her.